Elephants, tigers and 20 hour bus journeys, oh my!

Well, I'm still alive, in case anyone was worried!

Its difficult to get on the net very often because we've been moving around a lot, so sorry for not keeping you updated as often as I'd like (especially you Mum!)

Its been a bit of a whirlwind adventure since my last post. We spent some more time in Bangkok, where we ate more food, had more Thai massage, went to see a Muay Thai fight (which was phenomenal), and made friends with a tuk tuk driver. The Muay Thai night was crazy because we got there and Ross had lost his money, so we had to make a mad dash across Bangkok back to the hotel to get more. This is how we befriended the tuk tuk driver, because when you get in a tuk tuk and ask the guy to 'step on it', he really does. It was terrifying sitting in the back while he ducked and weaved through heavy traffic at ridiculous speeds, but as most of you who know me will testify, I love that shit so it was great fun. We even did a couple of wheelies!

At the arena itself we watched a few fights, which are pretty brutal (you could tell it was the real thing, rather than the theatrical nonsense they clearly have here in Phuket, but more on that later). While I was there I met a friend from London as well. How much of a co-incidence is that?! I didn't even know Gus was in Thailand! I couldn't believe it was him at first, small world eh?

After Bangkok we went on a two day tour around Kanchanaburi and the River Kwai. We went to the Death Railway cemetary, which houses the bodies of thousands of British and Dutch soldiers who died constructing the Japanese railway from Thailand to Burma. It was quite weird waking up in a minibus and suddenly being there, especially when you're instantly angered by all the yank tourists doing silly poses in front of the monument like its the f*cking Epcot centre. After the cemetary it was a quick trip up the road to see the associated museum and the Bridge over the River Kwae (that's how they spell it here, not Kwai). The museum was shit, frankly, cobbled together out of paper mache and old photos of Japanese soldiers and ancient weaponry from the time. We were most interested in the bridge itself, but that was a disappointment as well. The bridge is now utterly surrounded by tourist pap, like stalls selling nonsense and women walking around trying to sell you programmes. There are people absolutely everywhere, the bridge itself is covered in coloured lights, pyrotechnic equipment and the metal itself is covered in scratched graffiti. It was difficult to see it as more than just a bridge quite frankly.

From there we took a train ride on the Death railway itself. They call it the Death Railway because they reckon every sleeper involved in its construction represents the death of someone involved in creating it. Dark stuff. The train as it pulled into the station was absolutely packed with Thai people and we all looked at each other questioningly as it rolled in, wondering why we were about to board something that resembled the central line in summer. After a few stops though I managed to get to the doorway (past some ignorant fat German tourists, and hang right out of the side of the train. This is what made it worthwhile, as the whole scenery opened up to reveal the river, which is massive, and the surrounding mountains. It was absolutely stunning.

In the afternoon we rode elephants, which was pretty cool but a bit contrived. I'd expected some kind of trek through the jungle, but instead we were put on top of the elephant and then ridden around a paddock with light trees around, so we were esentially taken around a field. It was cool to ride them though, they're amazing creatures. Later in the day again (it was pretty action packed) we went to the Tiger Temple, an establishment run by monks as a sanctuary for various animals including, you guessed it, tigers. As we arrived we saw animals like boar, water buffalo, cows, chickens, peacocks and horses roaming freely, completely used to human presence and generally minding their own business. We were then lead to tiger canyon where we were told we could have a 'special' photo taken with a massive 3 year old male tiger for 1000 baht. Worth every penny we thought. The canyon had several tigers at the bottom, of varying ages and sizes, with several Thai and American staff walking people around to have their photos taken. In the middle was the big male, supervised by a monk called Badass Tiger Monk, because when the tigers got a bit...rowdy, he would rough them up, push them down on the floor and they would stay down. They knew he was boss. Amazing. Turned out some meat head with tattoos all over him had wound the big tiger up when we got there though, must have thought he was a threat or something because it playfully tried to bite him, which is severe when its head is the size of a small car. He eventually had his photo taken with it though, but hiding behind his girlfriend which was hilarious! Instead of paying the 1000baht, we were instead lead around the paddock and told to pose with each of the tigers while a member of staff took our photo with each with our own camera, which I was perfectly happy with! Really looking forward to seeing those photos. When we were done we got to see all the animals getting fed, and got to see the smaller tigers playing with the monks, chasing the pigs and being lead back to their cages. It really was a magical afternoon.

That night we dined on the river, on a floating barge. It was really picturesque, as the sun was just setting and the river rolled along lazily beside us. The sound of crickets and other chirping insects serenaded us as we ate traditional Thai food and generally made friends with the dozen or so other people on the tour. Once we'd finished we jumped on a long tail speed boat (named that way because it's long prop shaft sticks right out of the back, and the boat itself is long and thin). We sped up river to our floating lodge for the night, a series of wooden cabins actually floating on the water. Its was awesome. There was a bar attached and we drank into the night with other travellers and the staff there, especially Chai who was an absolute dude.

We were woken up at 7am the next morning, remarkably clear headed considering the amount we'd had to drink the night before. We were set to climb the Erawan falls today, which is set in a national park along a mountain side. I was expecting a waterfall, but instead it was a series of seven along a 2km hike up a jungle path. We pelted straight to the top, and when we got there we were knackered but it was worth every step. The falls at the top were astounding, and we got the chance to cool off by taking a swim and getting right under the falls. Once were were done there we ambled down again, taking a dip in each waterfall on the way down. We stayed at one that was apparently shaped like a pair of boobies, which admittedly made great water slides! I was like a big kid in a water park, it was great fun, and I kept climbing trees and jumping into the pools from them.

That was the end of our two day trip, and from there we went back to the lodge for a quick bite to eat, before jumping into the minibus and heading back to Bangkok. The minibus was uncomfortable, hot and generally unpleasant. It took us 3 hours to get into town, and when we arrived we headed straight to the local TAT office wehere we were to pick up our respective buses and trains to Phuket (Rick and Ross got the train, I got the 'VIP' bus). We had about an hour in between so had some food and chilled out. As the bus arrived I met a very cute Italian girl called Emanuala (I think that's what her name was anyway) and we got to chatting while we got comfortable on the bus. Little did we know that this was to be the worst bus journey ever. It was stiflingly hot in their, the chair did recline quite far but were still really uncomfortable, they showed Under Seige on the televisions and we were on there for 12 hours straight. I slept for all of 20 minutes. The company was good though, Emanuala was funny and very pretty, turned out she was in Thailand to do a Muay Thai camp (who'd have thought?!) and she's been to the country many times, so she gave me some good pieces of advice (one of which was to never get the VIP bus again). I also met Julie and V, who were from London, they were cool, they're art students and I did some drawings for V in his notebook. He'd just moved to Thailand for a few months, and Julie studies music at Goldsmiths (doesn the road from where I used to live in New Cross gate). We're going to meet up at the full moon party on Christmas eve in Co Pang'an.

The VIP bus took us to Surat Thani, where we disembarked, stretched our legs, drank some coffe and then boarded another, less comfortable bus down to Phuket, which took another 5 hours. Oddly enough though, Ricky and Ross got on the exact same bus after their train stopped at Surat Thani as well! That made life a bit more bearable, but you can imagine how tired I was by this point having not really slept at all.

When we arrived we caught a taxi to Patpong beach where we're staying. This place is a shit hole. Its like Ibiza, Kavos, Aya Napa and all those other meat head venues all rolled into one, but with that special Thai blend of Go Go bars and horrendous advertising. Its a real 'british tourist' place, its so fake and uncouth we've actually taken to naming it Fuckit. We're glad we're only here for a couple of nights before heading out by ferry to Kho Phi Phi. Last night we went to see The Golden Compass at the local cinema (its really quite good!), and experienced standing for the national anthem for the first time. After we had a couple of drinks in local bars but got fed up of being propositioned by whores and promoters for Go Go bars so called it a night. Its amazing how many lonely looking men there are walking arm in arm with bossy Thai women here. Not my cup of PG tips I can tell you. We're hitting the beach this afternoon, hopefully that will raise our opinion of the place, but I'm not holding my breath.

So, that brings me up to speed. We're in Kho Phi Phi for two nights then travelling to Ko Samui for a week. Not sure when I'll be able to get on here again, but will try my damndest to do so asap.

Hope you're all well and enjoying the nice weather I see you're having.

All the best

Jim